“Tell me nothing of the horse!” is a literal translation of the German idiom “Erzähl mir nichts vom Pferd!” – a very old-fashioned way of saying “Don’t bullshit me!” which allegedly refers to the Trojan horse. Someone said this to me in my early days of speaking German, leaving me perplexed. I imagine that horse whenever I have no idea what’s going on.

After graduating from NYU in 2011, I moved to Berlin. I work as a translator for an amusing mix of clients, and I live in the gentrified, twee borough of Prenzlauer Berg. My neighbors are all vegan babies.

Names have been changed. Anecdotes are mostly true.


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